The ABC’s of Modern Economics
A is for Agri—the land, or the field,
Which used to be cultured for what it would yield.
But now it is farmed, so proficient we’ve got,
For what it will yield? No, for what it will not!
B is for Bonus, which once was awarded
For extra performance, but now is accorded—
To those who increase the amount they produce?
No, rather to those who can ably reduce.
C is for Courage, which used to be named
The key to achievement, and widely acclaimed.
It led men to venture, to fail, to succeed
But now their success must be state-guaranteed.
D is for Dollar—a round silverpiece.
When loaned or invested it once could increase;
But now it is shrinking so fast that to lend it
May net you a loss, so you’d better go spend it.
E is for Effort. It used to be said
That effort would aid you in getting ahead.
But that is outmoded. Go easy, and wait,
And you will be pensioned and fed by the State.
F is for Folly, the blissful retreat
From reason to nonsense—the marvelous feat
Of making believe that the bigger your debt
And smaller your dollar, the richer you get.
G is for Gold, which is stacked up in blocks
In a cavernous underground vault at
The once-universal, safe yardstick of Earth;
But now we are off it: and what is it worth?
H is for Human, the "values" that surge
Through "liberal" talk. But whenever you urge
That they name you these values, it always comes out
It is physical things they are talking about—
And physical comforts, however they holler,
Are harder to get when they cheapen your dollar.









