It’s difficult to predict how parenting feels until you yourself become a parent. When the days seemingly pass as quickly as minutes, sometimes it’s challenging to find the time to pause and consider your parenting techniques.
“Peaceful parenting” can be a way to implement more calm and acceptance in your household.
You can try the simple things first, such as giving your kids the best cereal for breakfast. Another example could be looking up resources online, such as BetterHelp, who offers a full online database of articles written or reviewed by medical professionals with all forms of parenting advice. For example, click the link above to see their article about peaceful parenting.
Below, we’ve included four ways that a dad can implement the peaceful parenting technique in his own home.
Develop Close Relationships With Your Children
The best way to start peaceful parenting is by developing close relationships with your treasured children; and that goes both ways.
If you are uncomfortable opening up, apologizing, and admitting your vulnerabilities with your kids, then you typically can’t expect them to do the same.
Your kids may feel more secure and safe knowing that their dad, mom, or other guardian are emotionally open to them.
In addition, children may feel compelled to cooperate and behave with parents who are willing to listen to them. There are many ways to help build this bond with your kids, but chief among them is playing.
Play is vital in a child’s growth, as stated by Kenneth R. Ginsburg in their study, “The Importance of Play in Promoting Healthy Child Development and Maintaining Strong Parent-Child Bonds.” Through play, children explore the world, feed their curiosity, and learn. In a sense, when a child is growing, playtime is their job.
When playing, children experiment with the way their body moves, how to interact with toys or other kids, and expand their imagination. Most importantly, kids can learn how to recover from their failures.
For example, when a newborn baby is trying to crawl, they may slump on the ground and cry. Some may see their behavior as feeling frustrated for not moving their hands and feet the way they want to. But kids are strong. They can get back up and try again, until they succeed.
So, when adults join their children during play, parents can see the world through their kids’ eyes.
Likewise, by understanding their kids’ perspective, fathers and other guardians may help guide their young ones to help them navigate their surroundings. In this way, you can form a close kinship with your child, no matter how old they are, and combine your experiences with their understanding of the world to carve a path they can use as they grow and create their own life.
Disciplining Children Appropriately
Along with playing with your children, parents may need to learn how to inform their children properly when their behavior is unacceptable. You are raising a member of society, and no one wants to raise an adult who does not know how to act appropriately.
Before discipline, however, fathers and other parental figures may want to know how to attend to their kids’ needs.
Fathers can try to respond to their infants’ cries, such as using physical intimacy to calm them down. Furthermore, fathers can try praising their children for accomplishments. These can range from academic or sports achievements to something small, like learning how to crawl or walk.
In learning how to respond to their child when they do something good, fathers may feel better equipped to discipline them if their child misbehaves. Thus, the keys to good discipline, according to “The Importance of Fathers in the Healthy Development of Children by Jeffrey Rosenberg and W. Bradford Wilcox,” involve the following:
- Establish clear rules and enforce them
- Be consistent and use appropriate punishment for each occasion
- Explain to your child why they are getting punished
It may seem paradoxical, but children need and crave discipline and boundaries. It takes some pressure off them to know the rules, and know that they are capable of following them.
Benefits Of Early Involvement
For guardians, giving your children love and involving yourself with their lives is paramount in your child’s healthy development.
For peaceful parenting, seeking early involvement means your child can depend on you for anything. When kids grow up with parents who are with them every step of the way, they become more likely to develop higher self-esteem and become better resilient against stress and frustration.
Furthermore, kids may feel more engaged in their studies at school if their parental guardians support them. According to a study conducted by Sarah Allen, Ph.D., she and her co-authors observed children showing more prowess at academics with supportive fathers. Moreso, children are more likely to partake in extracurricular activities.
However, your children may still be susceptible to mental health duress. Remember, fathers and anyone else cannot go into their child’s psyche and fix the source of their problem. Rather, your job as a guardian is to let your kid know that you will always be there for them.
If you feel that takes a little pressure off you as a dad, then, good, it does! Much of the time, you really only need to be present with your children, and love them. If you are worried about being the best dad on earth, sometimes it really only takes attention. Remember, the opposite of love isn’t hate, it’s indifference.
Ask For Help From Other Fathers And Trusted Friends
Along with playing, better disciplining children, and being closely involved in a child’s life, fathers and other parents may benefit from searching out support groups or confiding in trusted friends for help in maintaining a peaceful household.
In a comprehensive study conducted by Gemma Sicouri and various co-authors titled, “Toward Father-friendly Parenting Interventions: A Qualitative Study,” the researchers pooled a group of fathers and asked them questions regarding specific questions about fatherhood.
For one particular topic, fathers indicated their preference for group formats. They enjoyed the social benefits it brings along with the multitude of shared parenting ideas.
However, the study also concluded their support group preferred father-only groups. Mixed findings do not agree on whether or not gender plays a role in fathers typically wanting to speak to other fathers. But, fathers can also feel more than encouraged to talk to their mothers, aunts, fathers, or friends they trust.
Along with an in-person support system, there are various resources online that can help educate fathers on everything they may need to know about parenting, including https://dadsrc.org/. Dads’ Resource Center includes many resources, research, tips, and ways to reach out to other dads for any father looking for more help. There are also testimonials, blog posts, and more that can help you find your footing to becoming the dad your kid needs the most.
Conclusion: How Dads Can Implement Peaceful Parenting At Home
Much like how kids learn to crawl by overcoming their mistakes, dads also won’t be perfect all the time. However, you can learn from your mistakes by educating yourself online, asking for help from other dads, and, most importantly, being there for your kid.
There is never a moment in your life where being a good dad is too late. Try to play with your kids, help them through school or other issues, and adequately discipline them so they can avoid their previous mistakes and become the best version of themselves, just as you are hoping to do as well.
